No Offense is Perfectly Charming

No Offense by Meg Cabot

Meg Cabot’s No Offense is a quick vacation from cold Midwestern temps to Key West…without the mask and the TSA peeps giving you the hairy eyeball. Pick this gem up and transport yourself for a few days. You’ll thank me.

I cannot tell you the last Meg Cabot book I read. I Googled her books and I honestly cannot recall. Tiny Dancer just read her From the Notebooks of a Middle School Princess series and hoovered them up. Total fangirl about those books.

But after No Offense, I’m zeroing in on her novels because gollllllly, she’s got a talent to craft that perfect mix of lightness and romance and enough side plots to really sink your teeth into.

And they’re off…

Molly Montgomery is Little Bridge Island (Key West, FL) Public Library’s new Children’s Librarian. She comes by way of Denver where she was engaged to her happily ever after guy until he kinda pulled a 1950’s card on her. Molly cut bait and headed to Florida after her mentor threw her an opportunity she couldn’t refuse.

Molly reminds me of the character from The Bookish Life of Nina Hill by Abbi Waxman. Well-read, has a plan, has social skills, has friends, but is kinda fine staying in her bubble. It’s a glorious book. Read that one!

Sheriff John Hartwell and his high school daughter Katie live in Little Bridge Island having just moved from Miami. John and his ex-wife split amicably when the opportunity for him to take on the Sherriff role in his hometown surfaced and she didn’t want to give up her design business. Katie lives with John and seems like the well-adjusted doll we all hope our pre-teen, eyes-rollin-so-hard-24-7 daughters will evolve into.

Molly isn’t looking to get involved with any man. EVER. John has his hands full with his daughter and his job.

So you see where this is going.

I’m intrigued…do go on

Molly discovers a newborn in the Children’s Department bathroom stall. The baby is safe (hate to be a spoiler, but I think our heads all go to bad places when you hear this stuff) and Sheriff Hartwell’s team is on the case faster than you can say key lime pie. Being an avid reader, Molly picks up on some clues shared by Sheriff Hartwell and his team. She inquires like the inner Angela Lansbury we all dream of being (but would never admit). But perhaps she sticks her foot in it a bit and muddies the sheriff’s investigation a bit. Eeps.

While John is crushin’ on Molly a bit, he’s also trying to solve the island-wide case of break-ins. He believes the abandoned newborn and the break-ins are led by the same asshat and he’s going to get this guy even if it means putting any feelings for Molly to the side.

But that proves to be pretty difficult.

Highlight reel

  • Seeing Molly’s tornado desk: “If the desks of any of his deputies back at the department had ever grown even remotely this disorganized, he would have referred them to human resources for counseling immediately.” The Type A in me gets this. I hope you’re shaking your head in agreement (not in pity that I’m an organizational nutbag).
  • John’s pants don’t fit all of a sudden: “Stop drinking beer,” Marguerite suggested. “My husband stops drinking beer and he drops ten pounds overnight. It’s God’s joke on women.” Preach, sister. This is my husband to a damn t.
  • The brilliant Meg Cabot inserts the word ‘macking’ in this book. Guys, I haven’t heard that word in probably 20 years and this made my freaking month to see this! I double dog dare you to use that in your day tomorrow.

What I really loved

What I really loved about No Offense was that this was equal parts mystery and slow-burn romcom. I was just as invested in finding out about the break-ins and the mystery of the baby as I was seeing Molly and John together (celebrity name Jolly?). I’d even go so far as to guess it was 60/40 mystery/romance. Boom.

In conclusion

  • Laughable moments: 4/5 😁
  • Steam: 4/5 🔥
  • Pace: 5/5 ⏩
  • Characters: 5/5 🏃🏾‍♀️
  • Would I read more of this author’s books? 100% yes